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I have MS

Oh please, not your socks again!! Just when we've reached the heights of poetry and toasting people from wellies!

Have you looked in the Big Box of Lost Things? Or does that actually exist outside of my head?


I have MS

Fiends, ponies and complements! Give me a hand!

A chap is entitled to know where his socks are whether the proletariat are quaffing gallons of whatever, or not, through various types of footwear. But that's a matter for another day.

I've written to Somebody Very Important about the situation and if you don't like it there are other people who you can write to but I divest. Here is my manifesthrow;

1< I believe a referendum is the only way to get to the bottom of the great sock debacle -

2> There is only three/one/several correct ways for a gentleman to put his socks on|

7 }insert bullet point[ And finally who enlightened invented the sock. and why. what colour was it. were there two. did they match.

4^ What does the ¬ button on a keyboard do?

12  .We the above should have an inalienable right to investigate the contents of Sue's Big Box of Lost Things that actually exist outside of her head and check it for intersects that might escape & decimate the nation's hop crop. hop scotch. scots sock. shock crop. crock stop[

6. Phew. DurerX

Well, I hope you are happy now, having got everyone on the forum going ¬ to find out what ¬ would do and finding that what ¬ would do was ¬. 

I liked point 12.  Let us know when you have got your teeth back in the right way around - if you ever do.  You could try taking the sock out.

Lol okay i will take it out


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To AD and other interested parties 

I do of course reserve the right to write to Important People on my own account. I don't think you have the monopoly on writing letters. Many of us have found ourselves required to write letters to important and unimportant people in the past.

In the meantime, however you choose to manage your sock collection is your own business, however, I do feel that someone needs to take control of such as you clearly are not preventing bad behaviour/abscondment in the Durer sock confraternity. 

In respect of your bullet points, however they are are enumerated, I have the following to comment:

1) when on earth did a referendum even solve anything? And surely, one needs to phrase ones questions more clearly in order to prevent further confusion?
2) Re the number of ways to apply ones socks, surely you are missing out certain ways in which one could/should consider, e.g. carefully, sensitively, defensively, saucily, aggressively, sensually, and additionally, one should not exclude ladies apparel and such other differentiations from ones consideration.
7)  with regard to the invention of the sock, I'm sure this is obvious, their invention has to go back as far as prehistory, but certainly the number should not always be two. You run the risk of exclusionism if not extremism by ignoring those with more or less than two legs. As for their colour, that is a personal preference as to matching or contrasting. 
4) my keyboard does not include the symbol you refer to but it does have a ^. What is this for?
12) you are welcome to investigate / interrogate the Box at any time you choose. Obviously you would be required to prove its existence first. Meanwhile, I choose to believe in its corporeality. 
6) phew
103) No


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I have MS

i am not voting for anyone sponsored by the London rubber company


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Oh please let’s stop this random answering of posts. It messes things up terribly. And if someone then decides to go and put something at say post 3578 we’ll miss it. 

Sue x (not voting for Durex you understand)

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You old Crockpot!!

Executive decision made today, all socks strachy or otherwise are now in the wheelie bin. All new soft lovely delicate all-black pairs of multiple socks will be purchased in the morning and my sock karma will be restored. Now I wonder why the heck I have been forcing these scratchy socks of a grey nature onto my little feet. Thank you for the sock inspiration.

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Very very sensible. Hebe. I'm glad to see you've retained/regained your most appropriate sock wrangling skills in this important issue. 


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I want to know if Ssssue's box, whether and/or wherever it exists, intersects with the floors in my house. I've dropped some small items recently and they seem to have disappeared. If anyone finds them I'd like to have them back. They were very useful.

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I'll have a look in the box, when it next arrives. I never know when it's going to appear so I can't promise anything. I'm sure it intersects with every place where odd bits and pieces are dropped. As well as being a repository for odd socks. 

Unless it's only in my head. I'm still not sure. I'll ask my keepers if they've ever seen it. 


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what do you mean "No"

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The opposite of yes usually. 

And when it comes to 'vote Durer' it was an automatic reaction. Admittedly when I first read it, I thought it said 'vote Durex', but I stand by my answer. I think I'm as likely to vote Durex as Durer. And in any case, trying to gain referendum votes by sneaking in a little x is a bit cheeky.

Sue (x)

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I read 'vote Durex' as well. I didn't say anything because I didn't want to seem weirder than I already do. Mind you, given the general effect of MS on cognition and behaviour, who would notice?

Can we rant about smartphones now. They completely overwhelm ne sometimes. Just making a phone call is a huuuge task! I want a nokia. Has anyone reverted to one yet?

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A few years ago I bought a smartphone. Recently I decided to downgrade to a phone with fewer features and, yes, it's a Nokia. I really only use a mobile phone for emergencies, but people keep calling me on it even when I've asked them to use the landline number. Frankly, I'd love to get rid of it completely but I need to be able to call hubby when I'm ready to be picked up after an appointment.

I have MS

I have a smart phone. But I don't give anyone the number. So I can use it for all its useful functions apart from making or receiving calls. So it's an excellent time keeper, calculator, diary, calendar, kindle reader, searchlight, internet connection, shopping list reminder, notes to self etc. But making a phone call on it, well you have to have friends first and be able to figure out the phone aspect second. 


Ssssue wrote:

But making a phone call on it, well you have to have friends first and be able to figure out the phone aspect second. 

And a good thing too.  These are convenient hurdles that I have - like you - wisely chosen not to attempt.

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Sounds like you lot should get together and form a cult.

I don't even have a phone. (It hasn't been invented in 1415).


Melancholic Albrecht.

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Sorry to hear you're melancholic at present AD, here's some news that might cheer you up, today I tracked down a missing pair of socks without the use of the Big Box. They'd been filched by my greedy OH who clearly didn't have enough of his own socks. But I made a commando raid on his sock drawer and there they were, hidden away under the holey old ones that he's not yet got around to putting in a charity bag. So there's hope for all errant socks. 

And I don't know what you mean 'form a cult'. I started my own years ago. Admittedly it's a little thin on members (at its height I counted two followers but they've both defected to the Jehovahs Witnesses, so at present there is only me) but you just have to be positive about things. It's an easy thing to start a cult, you just need a few oddball theories, steal a few bits and bobs from existing religions, write down some rules for members to follow, set up a guru or prophet, find a few well heeled followers to fleece and there you go. After all, everyone has to start somewhere, look at Scientology, the Moonies or Christianity. All began as simple little cults. So I'm very positive about the future of 'Ssssues Holy Unitarian Family of Adventists, Abraham and Buddha'. It's really very inclusive. Would you like to join? You only have to sign over all your current assets to me plus tithe 15% of your children's annual income for life. How about it?


Always write down the important things in one place so that if the brain fog hits, you still have passwords etc. But of course, you need to hide it from prospective burglars.

I bet you have spotted the flaw in this, haven't you?

Whole day wasted looking in and under things.

Lots of socks found though. Any takers?

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Dear Sue,

When you said you made a "commando" raid, are you sure you were looking for a sock drawer? As for your cult, "SSSSHUFAAB" (?) it  hardly glides off the tongue does it?

I'm an enormous cult. (I know it's a Kenneth Williams line but I'm going for it anyway). People stop in the street and point to me and say, "Look, it's that cult from the television".

I'm not aware that you need "members" to have a cult. Isn't it something more like a phenomenon? A meteor doesn't have to have followers to make an impact. As for my children's inheritance I blew that years ago. Invested in malt whisky and Cuban cigars. Nothing left now for the little buggers to waste on stuff like food and rent.

As for your friend Teal,  sounds like you're a perfect fit for Sue's cult. Nothing like a fruit named after a species of duck to round off a group meeting.

Just for the record, I'm not interested in everybody else's socks, only my own. Please stop cluttering up this Forum with your dreary anecdotes otherwise I'll  be on to Admin like a rat up a drainpipe.

Yours with seasonal Best Wishes,


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Ooooh, get you with your 'my socks are more important than your socks', 'I am a cult' and thus have no need to start one off. 'My anecdotes are more worthy than yours'. 

Well stuff you and your seasonal greetings 'Azza'!

Yours, with all the usual good wishes to your family, pets, etc


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Ooooh, get you yourself.

With your "usual" good wishes to my family. As for my pets, I only have 14 cats. And, yes they all match up in pairs. Two Siamese, two tabbys, two Manx and so on. And they are all called Sox, it helps a feeding time.

Yours, with all the usual etc,


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I suppose your cats would be called 'Sox'!

Have you ever thought about getting some kind of professional help with your sock obsession?


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Ant, Are you missing a 'black tom cat'.    4am - this morning - [yes there is such a time] my dogs started going apeshit.  Woke me up with a start. l came down stairs - telling them to shut up - as l thought it was probably a fox peering in at them through the glass doors.   But no- On the kitchen window sill was a black cat - looking rather annoyed at  4 large dogs all barking mad. 2 Rotties a deerhound and a Romanian shepherd. What a mess - as all my pots of herbs etc were all scattered on the floor and in the sink. l opened a window and shoved the poor puss out.  Then waited a few minutes before letting loose the hounds.  The only way that cat could have got in - was through an upstairs bathroom window - by climbing onto the leanto roof. The door into the kitchen has a small square cut out at the bottom as a cat flap [without the flap].

My 'resident' cat - Eartha Kitt - must be bringing home 'admirers' - the little tart. 

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Was he wearing an eyepatch?

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Yes   - on both eyes.

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Maybe he was more of a cat burglar, or if the patch covered both eyes he sounds like a highwaycat. 


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I get the feeling that some of you aren't taking me seriously these days.

I think I'll have a word with Oliver Admin, when the weekend is over, about vetting the more incredulous comments. I've heard that Mr Admin (any relation to Idi Admin, that notorious African despot? Just a thought.) doesn't muck about when it comes to wielding the old blue pencil. We'll see who's laughing by Tuesday!

It's probably worth stressing, at this time of year, that socks are not just for Christmas. With careful domestic management some can be retained in pairs until as late as March or April.

Yours, with all the usual etc,



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When l was a young lass - l had a T-Shirt - with a photo of ldi Amin on it - and a slogan saying   'Am in d Mood'.   My dad was not happy about me wearing it.  Could have been about 53yrs ago! 

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Mr Amin got his socks from the Kampala Woolworths

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This is exactly the sort of trivialisation I'm talking about. If you want to chat about T-shirts you should look on another forum.


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Dear Ant,

So this forum, and specifically this thread is where we can discuss socks. And no other items of clothing.

But only those belonging to Mr Durer. Who I might add is very careless about his sock husbandry. Judging by his frequent losses, he is either short on marbles, or rather negligent when washing, drying and/or pairing his socks. 

Personally I feel rather sorry for the socks in question, if I belonged to Mr Durer (and assuming I were a sock), I would be looking for a new home very soon after Christmas.

And if Oliver Admin, or Oliver Amin, or Idi Admin, or whoever else wants to wield his blue pencil on any of my remarks, all I can say is, 'do unto others as you would be done by', or words to that effect. 

Meanwhile, should any space garments want to air their views about T shirts, I think they should be allowed to, here or wherever else they so choose.

Yours, in fondness and kind wishes to all the little Sox's (I'm not at all sure that's grammatically correct but, what the hell)


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l do look at other forums - and ones that actually talk about treatment that help enormously with MS.   Vitamin D Protocol North America.  High dose Vitamin D. Biotin for Progressive MS. MS Recovery.   And also Atlas Re-alignment.    And l have been doing them all.   Feeling much better - no fatigue - walking about more.   Atlas re-alignment made a huge difference - and l was very sceptical - afterwards l was able to lift left leg - and even balance on one leg. Turn my head round to look behind me - [should be able to join a panto now]   All this after 34yrs of struggling with PPMS.  

Now looking for a t-shirt with Marty Feldman on it.    Might get one printed saying Marty Feltham. [Says she sticking out her 36DD's]

and her tongue!! 

Love ya.

I have MS


I will see spacemen in a new light from now on. I'll never be able to look at another astronaut ever again without the overlapping image of 36DDs.

I'm ruined! This is no way to treat an impressionable young man. I'll be traumatised for life.

I'll never sit the Civil Service exam now. And I was destined for a stellar career in the Foreign Office too. Astronomy has now closed it's doors to me because of the visual shock. I'd already given up any hope of a life in mathematics or satanism (same thing) because of my hexakosioihexekontahexaphobia.

And if that wasn't enough I've been expelled from the Institute of Chartered Accountants for my unique method of double-entry booking.

There's only one thing for it. I'll have to go into politics. Have I sunk so low?

See you at the Polling Station then.


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Will you  be changing your name to Trump! 

Blasted brain fog! I have just been dog sitting at my son's house. I went up to the local shop to get some bits and bobs for them and also whilst I was there bought them some really nice new socks as their socks are worse than mine! Got them back, laid them out on the bed and suddenly realised I hadn't bought any for me. So I am still wearing my one and only pair of nasty popsocks (an ex boyfriend used to call them sex killers ha ha) that are keeping me going till some brain messages actually get into gear.

The sock buying and sock balance continues.

Interesting to read A.D. that you were expelled from the ICA. I was once sacked for going on holiday so got a job in the next office down from the miserable man who sacked me. 

Oh joy to the world, here we are again another week and that lovely frost makes everything look so pretty. I am going to stop in, put the heating on this morning (wey hey really pushing the boat out now), feed the robin and the blackbirds and watch tat on tele. I might even prize the frozen washing off the line that is now dangling on the floor. Hey ho.

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Dea Hebe

I'm confused. Or brain fogged. 

Did you buy new socks for the dog? And at the same shop buy socks for yourself?

And does your sock collection really only consist of one pair of pop socks? If so, it doesn't actually deserve the name 'collection'!

Also, to be honest, I can't say that slipping into a saucy pair of pop socks would really make even the most avid sock fetishist excited. But I could be wrong, maybe ask AD?

Glad you're keeping warm. Maybe you could do with some nice new thick snugly socks to keep your feet warm!


Bought my son and his girlfriend socks, forgot mine!  Yes, fluffy socks on my Christmas request list and what does everyone expect off me every year = socks.

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Definitely brain fogged today. I got up and put on my house coat/dressing gown/whatever, something I have done almost every day for years. Today I stood there for a while trying to figure out whether to wrap left over right or right over left. That has to be brain fog because the alternative doesn't bear thinking about.

Next task: shower and deal with the fog that invariably goes with it - and I don't mean the condensation on the windows.

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Hello Cheerful_Dragon 

That is a perfect example of brain fog. It's like where your brain just will not make the appropriate connections, even when doing something you do every day. 

Don't worry too much about it, it's not likely to herald serious permanent cognitive dysfunction, in all likelihood you'll get up tomorrow and automatically do it up the right way. 

Its just a little alarm bell that tells you something's not quite right. 

If it happens often, or if you get really worried about your cognition, ask for a referral to a neuro-psychologist. I had an assessment earlier this year (referred by my neurologist), basically she said my on/off haphazard thinking was typical of the MS brain, basically a slowing down of the cognitive functions. It will probably deteriorate gently over time (like everything else) but isn't something that's going to send me (any more) doolally in the short term. 

Sue (serious for once!)

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I saw my MS nurse this morning. Partly it was my annual visit, but mostly it was to discuss my PIP award and sort out the medical evidence to support my request for Mandatory Reconsideration. When she read that I had 'no memory or cognitive impairment' she said that she doesn't have any patients who don't have such impairment. It's not something that I worry about, it's just something that sneaks up and gives me a prod from time to time, just to stop me getting complacent.

Actually, mental health was something we discussed at length. My appointments with my neuro and my MS nurse have always focused on the physical side of MS, probably because that's where my symptoms have been most obvious. The PIP application and award have forced me to look at how I've been affected mentally - cognitive issues, anxiety, adverse reactions to stress or stressful situations, loss of confidence... 

Today I had no problems with my dressing gown. I just didn't recognise my phone's ringer when hubby rang to check when I'd be finished with my MS nurse.frown

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I came in here for something.

What was it?

It began with an S ...

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There they are!

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I've wasted two days looking for them!

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And they they were, under a pile of unopened post all the time!