So, I have ‘given up’. I care for my Mum who has SPMS, diagnosed in 2002. Since the beginning of November, she has had two suspected infections and has been experiencing a cognitive decline that we are unsure is MS related. Aside from this side of things, Mum is now chair-bound, and needs help with almost all tasks. It’s just Mum and I - no immediate family or friends who are close by. All our support from friends is given over the phone, because of the pandemic. I am also trying to complete my degree - I was doing really well last year, but my grades have slipped because of everything that is going on.
I was able to cope with the physical side of things, but the mental aspects have been hard. After sleepless nights, frustration, fear and upset, I have reached out for more support in the home and I have also told my doctor about my mental state. I feel as if I have failed and given up. I am absolutely dreading sorting everything out in regards to putting care in place, especially whilst juggling exams and deadlines, but I am trying to see the positive side of things. I am looking forward to leaving the house for more than 10 minutes without worrying that Mum is not safe. I am looking forward to Mum having more simulation, and hopefully picking up a bit.
I am not sure what the point of this post is, but just felt that I needed to get this out of my system/off my chest.
I hope you have all had a lovely Christmas and New Year. x