Jokes

BBC SPORT: Kilmarnock interested in Belgian defender Mark de Man. Apparently, they are also interested in his compatriots, striker Skor de Gaulle and goalkeeper Bloek de Schott. *********************************************************************** They say the camera adds ten pounds. I knew this all camera diet was bad for me but they’re just so delicious. *********************************************************************** What do a Christmas tree and a monk have in common? Their balls are just for decoration. *********************************************************************** My mate just asked, “What’s an acorn?” I said, “Well in a nut shell, it’s an oak tree!” *********************************************************************** Some crocodiles can grow up to 14 feet… But usually they only have 4! ************************************************************************ A man walks into a library and says,“Have you got a book on gay sex?” Librarian says,“It’s on the bottom shelf just bend over and take it.” ************************************************************************ I’m tired of watching my team from the sidelines. It’s time we made a stand. ************************************************************************ I remember being a kid and my parents filling my head with nonsense, like Santa, the Easter bunny and the Tooth fairy etc. Well now that I’m older I don’t fall for that nonsense any more, thank God. ************************************************************************